Christmas Hiatus

Hey all,

First off, sorry to have missed Friday Funnies last Friday, got swamped that day with Christmas doings; and that leads into the rest of this. With no submissions yet to last week's contest, I think it's a good time to wait for some entries and take some time off until after the new year. I'm hoping to come back January 4th with contest results and new content. Thanks for sticking with me through these first few months, and I'll see you after the ball drops.

Merry Christmas, all; and Happy New Year.

Vault of the Mad Chocolatier: A belated second entry

Alright, everybody. I won't say I've been doing this for a while, but I think it's at least been long enough to try for a reader response contest, and, since I haven't done a Vault of the Mad Chocolatier in a while, let's go with that.

For those who don't know, the Vault of the Mad Chocolatier is where I list out a few interesting and devious items, weapons, and miscellany for filling out RPG treasure rooms. Now, for the contest.

Include in the comments below a name and description for a magical, or mechanically interesting, or ancient technological, or whatever other cool modifier you can think of, item that would be a fun inclusion in an RPG. A week from today, I'll do another post including every entry I liked and naming a winner among them. (your congratulatory bragging rights should ship in 5-10 business years).

So, let's hear 'em. What are the best items to reward, trick, or trap unwary players?

Happy gaming, all: and good luck to you.

Giving the Gift of You

Hey all,

With Christmas rolling in, many of us are going to be spending some time with friends and family; and sometimes, it can be hard to share things that matter to you into the lives of the people you care about. Some hobbies just don't register with your loved ones, and you may have, like me, decided to just try and make peace with that.

However, after going to a store called St. Nick's here in Denver, I realized that there may be more overlap between Christmas tradition and nerd culture than I'd thought. So, here's some small ideas for sharing the hobbies you like with the people you love.

Miniatures
If you're anywhere in the painting, customizing, or even building of miniatures, you're part of a rich tradition that's well appreciated at Christmas time. Snowy villages and nativity scenes can brighten the holidays, and something homemade with the professional polish I know this hobby has mustered before can be a meaningful and treasured gift. This website has a tutorial for houses as well as one for trees if you'd like to go the "Christmas Village" route.

Board Games
If you've dived deep enough into the board game community, you've probably got quite a collection behind you. Share that hobby with your loved ones. Some families bring out battered copies of Monopoly or Yahtzee, but there's no reason your Nascar uncle might not give Formula D a try, or your superhero-obsessed nephews might enjoy a carefully selected game of Legendary. I've personally introduced my parents to Tsuro, Qwirkle, Ticket to Ride, Settlers of Catan, Love Letter, and probably several more I can't remember off the top of my head. Gaming's come a long way from the rainy day distractions when we were kids, and older relatives might be open to learning a new game or two over the holidays.

Storytelling
It's no coincidence that some tabletop games call their game masters "storytellers". The skills you develop here can make you a gem for Christmas plays, dramatic readings, and other storytelling events of the holiday season. Psyche yourself up to take the stage and remember that those long nights over a grid map have been training you for public speaking: both in confidence and skill.

That's what I've got on the subject. If you know other aspects of the stereotypical nerd community that could enrich the holiday season for everyone involved, feel free to chime in in the comment section below.

Merry Christmas, all.

GURPS supplements I'd like to see in 4th edition

Hey all,

Following the successful funding of Dungeon Fantasy powered by GURPS on kickstarter, Steve Jackson games has announced Mars Attacks powered by GURPS. This gives me some hope of seeing a fourth edition explosion of content like what GURPS had in its third edition heyday. With that in mind, here are the supplements I'd love to see remade with a fresh coat of fourth edition paint.

#5. GURPS Humanx
Let's start with one of the most obscure game supplements I've ever stumbled across. I should preface this with the fact that I haven't personally gotten my hands on most of the ones on this list, I'm just kind of jazzed that stuff like this is out there to try and get my hands on one day. This one I did see in a store, and I still vaguely regret not picking it up. It's just so left field to make a rules supplement for such a little known property as the works of Alan Dean Foster, and the setting is rich and vibrant enough to pique my interest in coming to something like this for a future game.

#4 GURPS Scarlet Pimpernell
Subtitled "Swashbuckling Adventure in Revolutionary France" this seems to be exactly what the title suggests: a supplement book for playing through the world of Baroness Orczy's prototype of the modern superhero story. If that doesn't sell on the idea of roleplaying outside of the classic D&D mold, then I don't know what will.

#3 GURPS Atomic Horror
I've actually got the old edition of this one coming in the mail, but it'd be great to see a retread of this material in the fourth edition rules. Atomic Horror is all about 50's B-movie science fiction, and with my groups, that'd turn into a night of mystery science theater-ing any GM's best laid plans in glorious fashion. Not only should this come back for the sake of B movie action, but for the tips and tricks for incorporating this sort of thing into your spy dramas and monster of the week government agency stories.

#2 GURPS Conan
There's something charming about old school sword and sorcery. RPGs that take more cues from serialized pulp adventures than from Tolkien inspired epics have a different flavor that evokes something somewhat Arthurian. For players looking to branch out into what GURPS is capable of, but need a few sessions with training wheels, a low magic fantasy like this would be perfect.

#1 GURPS Ice Age
Y'know, maybe this one doesn't deserve the number one spot on a purely objective measure, but this isn't a purely objective measure. This is what Joe likes, and what Joe likes is settings where wolves are a scary threat and the environmental hazards are as likely to kill you as the combat encounters. Prehistoric worlds are a vast and, largely untapped, genre in both adventure fiction and RPGs, and anything that helps these stories of both harshly grim and enduringly hopeful themes to happen is all right in my book.


So, there's my list. What GURPS supplements would you like to see brought back? What supplements have they never made that you'd love to see them take a crack at? Share in the comments below. Happy gaming, all.

Game Review/Game Bump/First Impressions? : Tales from the Borderlands

So, I'm not really sure what to call what I'm about to do here. It'll be a little less formal than a review, a little more critical than a product bump, and a little too late to be a viable first impressions write-up. Nevertheless, we're talking about Tales from the Borderlands today.

Tales from the Borderlands is principally thought of as a Telltale Games title, although other studios collaborated on the project. This mostly has to do with the fact that it just feels like a Telltale game. A few key choices matter, and the choices that don't matter look and feel exactly like the ones that do, which makes every choice feel like it has the potential to change events. Characters are well developed, and, like-able or not, they are at least interesting. Combat is primarily quick-time events or shooting galleries and is as likely to feel dis-empowering as to feel empowering. If you've played a game like the Walking Dead or The Wolf Among Us before, you know the feeling I'm describing here.

The Good
The humor in this game is spot on. Intermingled as it is with the action; it makes this game feel like playing a Guy Ritchie movie. Additionally, the voice acting is superb. Celebrity appearances from Chris Hardwick and Patrick Warburton sell a big draw quickly, and lesser known talent earns that "talent" title in spades on this project.

The Bad
The language may be a bit much for some people, and, while not gratuitous, the M rating is warranted on this title. This game also has a problem shared by many Telltale titles (looking at you, Wolf Among Us) of giving a fairly satisfying ending about thirty seconds before doing something that tries to be mind-blowing, and ends up being more confusing than anything. At the risk of spoilers, I won't go further into that, but just know that you should look for your enjoyment throughout the game rather than hanging the whole notion of game enjoyment on finding that perfect ending.

The Excellent
This game's premise is one I wouldn't have thought possible: specifically, it is a choose your own adventure story with an unreliable narrator. The main story is told in flashbacks by a pair of characters who continually bicker about what really happened, and the framing device deals with the mysterious figure who has captured these two, and about what he might want with them. The fact that they pulled this off, and did it with such panache, speaks volumes of the ground Telltale is and has been breaking in the gaming industry.

. . .and that's it. That's what I've got coming out of this experience. If I fanboyed a little over Telltale, I'm not even sorry, they make some of my favorite stuff. If you're interested in trying the game for yourself it is available here.

Happy gaming, all.

Fallout Denver Session Notes 1: Wherein our heroes do something heroic for the first time in their lives.

War, war never changes. In the fires that consumed the old world, the American authorities sought refuge in Vaultec's master control vault in Cheyenne Mt. Their flight from what is now the Capitol Wasteland led a trail of destruction from the east coast straight into the heart of Colorado. Their escape was pinned down in Denver, and the full fury of the atomic war machine unleashed its devastating power. Control-group vaults in the area were prompted to play a pre-recorded message, urging inhabitants to wait for representatives of Vaultec to let them know that the fallout had passed. Yours was one such vault. Sealed against time, and damaged by an atomic force beyond all projections, your forebears waited. Thirty years ago, a group at the door was welcomed with eager expectation, and a vicious gang known as the Angels was admitted to Vault 4. The vault has become a crime empire, built on the backs of slaves: built on your backs. The vault dwellers toil on, making  the gang's drugs and weapons, and continue their long dream of daylight. 

This marked the beginning of our painfully non-canon game in the ruins of old Denver. I'm running this game in the GURPS system, and the first session spent a lot of time in character creation, as they tend to do. Character creation gave us three characters for adventures in the wastes:

Chance: A vault dweller entrusted as an Angels enforcer. He is a strong melee fighter with a careless attitude.

Gadget: A vault dweller assigned to work the weapons repair and reloading benches. She has a natural aptitude for machines and technology that surpasses many of her peers. 

Remington: A vault dweller with little known about him. He tends to keep his head down and seems able to slip away unseen as he likes. 

These three had only just acclimatized to the world when the rebellion broke out. Remington used a stealth-boy like mutation to fade against the walls and see what was happening. Gadget immediately took a gun from near the repair station and palmed it until she could get a feel for the situation. Chance, on the other hand, was front and center when the drug lab exploded in a cloud of flaming gas. Drug mixers in masks stormed out of the lab with makeshift shields crafted from surgical trays and began raining chemically enhanced molotov cocktails down from the railing onto the common areas below. 

Above, on the approach to the overseer's office, the Angel's members had beat a hasty retreat and barricaded themselves into the area. Chance fought his way to the top of the staircase with the drug mixers in tow and began to engulf the room in flames, while fighting through those same flames. All the while he was shouting, "We have to do this, for glory!"

The fighting pushed back down the stairs, now slick with flaming oil, and, in the scuffle, Gadget and Remington made it up to join in the fighting. The local representative of the Angels barricaded himself in the overseer's office, and, after goading him out to the railing to try to calm the vault dwellers, the party watched as the vault dwellers grabbed him and flung him from the railing. In the aftermath of all of this, Chance made it to the overseer's office and tore open a locker. "What's that?" someone asked. 

"This," he replied, lighting up the shish-kebab (flaming sword) in his hand, "is Glory."

As the vault settled back down, and recriminations died in the exultation of freedom, troubling facts were brought to light. The lower levels of the vault had been becoming increasingly more irradiated over the years, due to damage sustained in the blast. The vault dwellers would need new homes, and soon. It was decided that these three should take the Angels' radiation suits that had been left in the vault and set out in search of a new home for the people of Vault 4. They assembled in the front room and watched as the vault door opened, to allow them to step outside for the first time. 

. . .and that is where the first session ended. I've tried to remember events accurately, but if any of my players are reading this, I won't claim any better than "did my best". We'll pick up at session two next time I decide to write one of these. Happy gaming, all. 

Divided Loyalties: How to be good at being lawful good.

Hey all,

This is something I've been wanting to talk about here for a while. The alternate title for this article would be: "How not to be lawful stupid".

For anyone unfamiliar, lawful good is one segment of the classic dungeons and dragons alignment chart. The chart uses two spectrums to help define characters' motivations and goals. The two axes are Good-Neutral-Evil, and Lawful-Neutral-Chaotic. These two spectrums create nine individual alignments. I'll do a brief run-down of them, and them go into the main thrust of this article:

Chaotic Evil: a self-seeking force of chaos, like the Joker.

Neutral Evil: self-seeking above all else. Willing to use or break laws as suits them.

Lawful Evil: a loyal devotee of evil establishments.

Chaotic Neutral: anti-establishment for the sake of being anti-establishment. "Liberté, Egalité, Fraternité"

True Neutral: This might be the most difficult alignment to get a handle on. Some players use it to remain aloof and uninvolved in the world, as the Brotherhood of Steel would. Some build characters who view good and evil as human constructs, best kept in strict balance in the world, in a form of pseudo-eastern mysticism. Still others, use this to refer to simple, honest folk, unlikely to join the militia, and even more unlikely to be the threat that makes a militia necessary. Rest assured, I plan to come back and talk about True Neutral characters once I finally get a handle on them myself.

Lawful Neutral: law above all else. "My hands are tied.", "The Prime Directive is not a suggestion." etc.

Chaotic Good: freedom fighters and vigilantes. The law is either too corrupt or too incompetent for good men to follow blindly.

Neutral Good: do the right thing. Act with compassion, and strive for harmony.

Lawful Good: and now, we come to the crux of this article. Most players see lawful good characters as absolute paragons who never need to stop and think in order to do the right thing. I'd like, however, to propose a different read on these characters.

Lesser of Two Evils is Still Evil
This boils down to drawing a line between what is lawful and what is right. Perhaps a character believes that it is never right to take a life, but that in some circumstances, it is the lesser of two evils. This phrase in particular can do a lot to define the lawful good character. "The Lesser of Two Evils."

C.S. Lewis once said: "Do not let us mistake necessary evils for good." For the lawful good character, every necessary evil weighs heavily on the soul. When the character must choose between saving one and saving two, they will save two, and live on, haunted by the one they abandoned to lethal fate.

Bad Government is Better than No Government
For the lawful good character, the law is right. More men, women, and children are made safe by the rule of law than by any actions of a single heroic individual. The character must weigh the rule of law against their own desire to do right when the law is wrong.

Every act of vigilantism weakens the edifice of government, yet not every government rules as it ought. If the king's guard takes bribes with the king's knowledge and consent, yet the presence of the guard saves lives from the tribal marauders; how much can one really do about the bribery?

Loyalty is Ethical, even Loyalty to the Unethical
For the lawful good character, loyalty is a high calling. To be loyal is to be moral. Yet, the authorities demanding loyalty may require acts of loyalty that are wrong for the common people.This leads into the last point.

Obey the Liege Lord and Serve the People
The royals rule by divine right. It is fitting that they should rule, and yet, their rule is often unsuited to the good of the common people. For the lawful character, the will of the authorities is supreme; but for the good character the good of the common people commands the highest loyalty. It is here that we have the central conflict of the lawful good character. For this character, his loyalties are divided. You cannot please everyone, and for the lawful good character, this impossibility can become a consuming guilt.



For more on complex, lawful good characters, I highly recommend the Sano Ichiro novels by Laura Joh Rowland. The first in the series is called Shinju. These are the best books I've ever read at dealing with the internal character drama of the lawful good character, and I'd go so far as to call it a must-read for anyone who plays tabletop games and thinks lawful good characters are "bad" or "boring".

Happy gaming, all.